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Wednesday, June 3, 2009

One of our biggest battles

Today I decided to post something that is majorly effecting our lives, it's always been a problem and I am at my wits end, I just don't know what to do at this point.

When Orion was a first potty training, pooping in the pot was our biggest battle. He could pee like a pro...his underwear were always dry and we never had a problem with that part, it was always (and still is to this day) a battle to get Orion to do #2 on the toilet. He's a holder, he will hold that poo in his body for days on end because he doesn't like to go. We tried rewards, we tried books, we tried talking and would have been just as effective if we had talked to a wall. I have even tried making him sit on the toilet every single day...the pediatrician suggested not letting him get off the toilet until he actually produces, but his stubborness is strong and he will literally sit there until I have other thngs I have to do and can't let him sit there any longer. He's very good at being stubborn! I have sat him on the toilet first thing in the morning on a Saturday and he will sit there for 2 or 3 hours and not do a thing but cry that he wants to get off. I give him books, I tell him he can get off once he produces, but he knows eventually I will have to get him off of there and head out to the bank before it closes. When he was little I had to add Miralax to his juice so his poo would get soft enough that he could barely control the flow, eventually he would HAVE to go and he would literally put out so much that it would clog the toilet! It would hurt pushing out so much poo and that would only make him hold it even longer the next time....fearing the pain has been one of the biggest battles. I try to explain to him that the pain wouldn't be there if he would just go at least every other day...but alas he will wait and wait and wait until he's practically compacted and we have to give him more stool softener and ex-lax to make him go. I hate the cycle he has laid out for us and I just don't know what else I can do. This is one thing I simply can not do for him, I can't force it out of him without the use of ex-lax or other laxative pill or suppository, like I said before, I'm at my wits end.

One of the biggest drawbacks to him being a holder (besides the fact that he's not pooping regularly) is the fact that he gets grumpy and irritable everytime it builds up. Once he's been holding it for 4 or 5 days he starts getting angry and frustrated with everything and everyone. It's difficult to deal with, his mood just gets worse every single day until he finally goes. I could just dose him with ex-lax or stool softener every single day of his life, but would that be a good plan? The pediatrician says I should only do that when he hasn't gone in awhile and is at the point where he's starting to get the skid marks again because the poo is trying to get out of his body. She seems to think I just need to sit him on the toilet everyday and eventually his stubbornness will break and he'll learn to just go...first of all, he has to go to school so I can't play that game all the time. Afterschool he has homework, cub scouts, bowling, etc. I can't deny him all his happiness just because he is a holder. There has to be some solution to this problem, something that will make it easier for him and me....I'm hoping that maybe someone will happen upon this blog and have an answer for me, I'm hoping that maybe someone else has gone through this and can help me feel not so alone.

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